Meet Gadget

Gadget's the politician where I'm the warrior. When I originally wrote the exam which became part of the interview process for software it included phrases such as "to see where you lied on your application." Gadget somehow made it look professional again.

***

"Where are you going?" Gadget asked over his cereal.

"Warped Tour!"

"Your pinky wouldn't fit in a compact parking space anymore."

"Its just a bruise."

"You need to go to the hospital."

Turns out the tickle fight with Pacem the day before had earned me two broken bones I had not even noticed. God only knows how my hand would have healed if I hadn't gone and had them fixed up. I bought Gadget a Cold Stone Sundae for it.

***

"And she burned it to the ground."

The high school intern's eyes look like they're about to fall out of his head. I'm a bit too busy chewing my sandwich to correct Gadget, so I don't for a moment, and simply enjoy the total look of bewilderment.

I guess calling Gadget the constant counterbalance to my immaturity isn't a fair statement either.

"The whole high school?"

"Do you think I could make something like that up?"

***

"You're scary!" The new high school intern said.

I can't tell if the kid is serious or not. On the one hand I can't imagine ever saying that to any of my bosses, especially not if it was true. On the other hand it is something I have seen my sister say and mean, is this part of her generation?

"Ah," I said, "Well, I haven't done anything mean yet as far as I can tell...is there something I'm doing which is making you uncomfortable?"

"You're SCARY."

Ah, she must think this is funny then. I look up to find her edging toward the door. This is going to be a long summer.

Gadget turns around in his chair and grins like a madman.

"She's horrible!" he shouts, "You have no idea! She beats us when we work too slowly!" The girl's eyes widen in a pattern which is sadly quite familiar.

"RUN!" he screams, "RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN."

The girl bolts from the room and Gadget dissolves into a fit of giggles on his desk. I watch the door hang in the air for a moment before it bumps shut in the breeze.

"Man, you are going to get me in so much trouble."

***

"I want a flaming homophobe to be in this program next year."

I sigh, "No you don't."

"Yes I do. I want him to come in all angry...and slowly convince him to change his ways and accept everybody..."

"You want to live in a Disney movie is what you're saying."

"Is that...really so bad?"

***

This is the thing I love most about Gadget. While he is fully aware and respectful of the fact that humans are complicated, he has enough sense of humor about himself and the world to reduce all of us to cardboard cutouts and imagine the lot of us cavorting through some campy Disney film. At first you feel insulted by it, but over time you see that his caricture of you is mostly positive, and more than a little based on reality. You just need to get over yourself enough to admit it.

***

"Pika," Gadget says, "you're a five year old boy and I'm going to prove it."

A good chunk of the program is laying exhausted in the grass of the parade grounds. My head is on my at-the-time boyfriend's stomach as I turn the frisbee over in my hands. All of us are looking at the sky, enjoying the tips of the grass blades which obscure our perripheral vision.

"Shoot," I say.

"Pika, I'm getting you a TIE fighter for your birthday."

Even if I hadn't sat up immediately the excitement in my voice is a dead giveaway, "Really?"

For whatever its worth, he was good for his word. It was probably one of the coolest presents I ever got.

***

Some people find a sense of wonder in the world. Gadget, in some senses, makes his own.

***

He stands at the top of the fire escape outside the window of my larger lab, fishing through his pockets. Gadget opens his palms, and picks through the findings. Pocketing the majority of these results he takes the remainder and flips them, one by one, off his thumb and out the side of the building, as if calling a coin toss with somebody only he sees. All I can pick out are a few slices of copper as they flicker through the sky.

"I figure," he smiles, "that somebody's got to keep the lucky penny supply going."